H5N1 found in Sportspark Footballers

Arriving late to tonight's game I saw a scene not unlike that presently going on in Diss. The numbers were very high and with no bibs everyone looked the same. I was immersed into this quagmire of confusion....Who the feck do I pass to? I was not alone in my dilemma.

En masse we looked like a frantic flock of Turkeys trying to avoid the hands of the blood thirsty cullers. The late arrival of Derby 'how do you spell relegation' Tim heralded the provision of the bibs. In an instant we had clarity of team members and a consequent realisation that our hectic display was not solely dependent on the absent bibs.

Despite this negative beginning the game had some fantastic moments and great battles. Man of the match was unquestionably Gerry. His Gandalf-like 'though shall not pass' performance was the perfect counter action to the ever present threat of Stefan. His magnificence was worth 6 or 7 goals. Little Tim was his superb defensive partner and the colours were engaged in far too many goal line scrambles but they seemed to handle most of the onslaughts.

Other performances were harder to pick out in the throng of players. The superfluid passing of recent games was not evident tonight. The game was fractured with disjointed interplay between team members.

Some contentious calls were made for handball. Taha was aggrieved at such accusations made against him though this may have offset his Dida-esque performance after a tussle with Stefan.

As for my own performance, I can honestly say that I just about managed a sweat after 50mins of play and was lucky enough to touch the ball on several occassions. My only saving grace was a nicely placed pass to David 'Ginola' Clifford in the last seconds of the contest. Despite some nice passes into the box earlier in the game Dave conjoured a miss in front on goal that left the teams on level pegging at 5 each. I was bemused that the colours has managed a draw as I was ready to accept a loss. On reflection however, I think Gerry's masterful display deserved the hard fought draw at the very least.

This friday vaccinations against bad passing will be available. I for one will be taking the jab and all subsequent boosters. Hopefully we can avoid displays of fractured passing in future games.